A Man Is Not Your Savior: Singleness Is Not a Curse

This one’s personal. Probably one of the most vulnerable topics I’ve ever touched on. Because if I’m being real? For the longest time, one of my most fervent prayers has been, “God, please bless me with my husband.”

And after praying that prayer so many times, with no answer, I started feeling… stuck. Frustrated. Hopeless, even. So, I switched it up. Instead of begging for a husband, I asked, “God, what is it in me that needs healing before he arrives?”

And whew, when I tell you God didn’t hold back?!

As I sat in silence, waiting for an answer, I heard Him so clearly:

“Bre, you think your husband is going to make everything easier, and that’s not the case. If you don’t see your own worth, beauty, and strength, trying to live off his will not sustain either of you. I’m delaying your gift because I want you to see that I am THE savior. I am your savior, not your husband.”

Let me tell you—that hit me like a ton of bricks. Because deep down, I realized I’d been carrying all these silent beliefs:

💔 That I’m not truly beautiful or attractive to a man.
💔 That I’m damaged goods, too broken to be chosen.
💔 That maybe singleness is my fate, and I’ll never have the family I dream of.
💔 That a husband would swoop in and “fix” everything—my insecurities, my business, my future.

But God was reminding me that no man—no matter how loving, faithful, or amazing—can do what only HE can do. No man can be my savior. No man can heal wounds I refuse to acknowledge. No man can give me self-worth if I don’t believe in it myself.

Singleness Is Not a Waiting Room

Somewhere along the way, we were conditioned to believe that singleness is a punishment or a prelude to the “real blessing” of a man. But sis, let’s reframe that real quick:

Singleness is not a curse. It’s an opportunity.

Too often, when we’ve been betrayed or let down in love, we think finding the “right” man will erase the pain of the wrong one. But healing doesn’t come from replacement—it comes from restoration. Not of another relationship, but of yourself.

Before you ask God for a man to complete you, ask yourself:

👉 Do I feel whole on my own?
👉 Do I see my value outside of relationships?
👉 Am I confident in my purpose, whether single or taken?

Because here’s the truth: True intimacy isn’t built on neediness; it’s built on wholeness. If you’re looking for a man to fill your emptiness, you’ll always feel like something is missing—even when you’re in love.

What If Singleness Is a Season of Becoming?

What if this time is a gift? A season where you:

✨ Discover your passions, not just romantic ones but the things that set your soul on fire.
✨ Cultivate your peace, so your joy isn’t dependent on anyone else.
✨ Build a life you love, so when the right love arrives, it’s an addition—not the foundation.

Sis, singleness is not a delay—it’s a divine assignment. It’s a time to heal from generational patterns, from self-doubt, from chasing love that was never meant for you. And when you embrace it? You stop settling. You stop wasting time in situations that drain you. You stop idolizing relationships and start aligning with your purpose.

God is not withholding love from you. He’s positioning you for love—the kind that complements, not completes. The kind that’s built on strength, not desperation.

So, if you’re feeling overlooked, forgotten, or frustrated in your singleness, let me remind you:

💖 You are not behind.
💖 You are not unworthy.
💖 You are not waiting—you are becoming.

A man is not your savior, sis. You are your own salvation story. And when the right love comes, it will fit into the life you’ve built—not define it.

And listen, I know this isn’t always easy. I know what it’s like to long for partnership, to dream of family, to wonder when it’s my turn. But we serve a God who is never late, who never overlooks His daughters, and who always has a greater plan than we can imagine.

So in the meantime? Live, love yourself deeply, and trust that what’s meant for you will never pass you by.